Be thankful for your foster or adoptive parents and ...

Hi blog family!!

Today was special and I will share my speech with you for fosterparents and adoptive... IF you are in a group home...I want you to focus on HOW TO MAKE YOU BETTER!! SCHOOL, CHOOSING GOOD FRIENDS, ASKING QUESTIONS, STAYING AWAY FROM TROUBLE...AND TELLING YOURSELF EVERY DAY....I AM SPECIAL!!! I have friends that made it out of group homes just fine BECAUSE they kept their sanity and never allowed themselves to give up!! You are amazing and You have divine purpose to be here!!! find out what it is....if you ever need me to answer any questions....email me tgirlcooper@yahoo.com   there is NO reason you cannot be a success!!! You were born to win!!!xo

Do your part by staying in school and becoming the next president!! (ok...i'm just saying you should go for the top so that you can help change the world)...but we love you no matter what you do!!!

SPECIAL THANKS TO ALL THOSE WHO HAVE FOSTER OR ADOPTED KIDS, YOUR WORK IS NOTED AND APPRECIATED!! XO TANYA

“A PIECE OF MY STORY” by Tanya Cooper

August 13, 2011

No part is to be reprinted without permission from the author

I’d like to thank all of you, 

for allowing me to share in your celebration of foster and adoptive parents.

 I know all to well the impact a great foster parent can have on a child not only reaching independence - that part is easy, just turning 21 gives you independent status- The real test is once your kids are on their your own: knowing how to navigate life when storms come and how to enjoy life- even in the middle of a storm! 

I will share a piece of my story with you and a brief memory of one of the best days of my life! The 1st day i meet my foster mother! 

I remember a policeman and a CPS worker knocking on our door when i was 5 yrs. old. I vaguely remember being moved around to a couple of different group homes in NYC.

My memory starts to become clear when my case got transferred to Westchester County in  the early 1970’s. My mother was a heroin addict and alcoholic, who often lost track of time: hours, days, weeks, months would pass! 

My sister became our mother when she was 5 years old! When we had no lights or food, my sister would comfort us and find a loaf of bread. One time, she snuck us out of the apt to get fresh air, I fell off a swing and needed stitches under my eye, she had someone call the ambulance, while she had her street friends find my mother first, so that no one would know we were outside alone. 

When we needed a hug because we missed mommy, my she would wrap her loving arms around us, until we forgot about mom not being home.

when a curtain caught on fire - because my  brother discovered matches, my sister put the fire out! 

When my brother Rob and I had chicken pox- it was my sister rubbing calamine lotion on us!

 There were many times we should have been in a foster home or could have starved to death, but by the grace of God - we were always protected from harm.

We would see our mother every now and then but eventually due to her addiction- she stopped showing up - my sister also got tired of playing mommy around 8 yrs. old.  

She knew she could love us but she could no longer  keep us feed and safe! Cps was called in and my mother  would later lose her rights, her 4 kids and her battle with addiction! I am grateful to her for knowing she did not have the tools to care for us. It was my foster mother that made me understand, sometimes, your parents are only a vehicle to get you here- 

My memory becomes very clear when I think of the 1st time I meet my foster mother- who was a widow with one adopted son and 2 foster boys at the time she got

my brother and I -  BUT later would meet and marry my favorite man, my foster father!

 I was 7 years old and It was the 1970‘s - We were living at a large group home facility and it was a special day because foster parents would come visit and choose a child to take home-now that style is outdated but i share this story for a reason. 

I was in the gym with many other kids running & playing. I remember I was with my sister and my brother Rob. 

Everyone was playing, laughing, running but me! I was excited that someone may “choose” me to go to a real home! I wore a pretty yellow dress that was way to small because that was all that could be found for me.  Even though it was not my size, it was the 1st dress I owned!! 

I was able to to be grateful very early because I knew previously, I wore the same clothes for months, 

  I thought hard that day in the gym while I waited to find a new home. 

because I had moved around to a few of different places, I knew then, I did not like this “group home life, accept for the fact that; there was always food and i was with my siblings.  

In the group home the kids appeared to run   

As i stood in the gym that summer day, I noticed my baby brother running, smiling and checking back with me every few minutes. 

My sister was in eye sight with her new friends. My brother  Rob ran over and looked up at me and said: “Sis - you think we’ll find a home?” I said: “yes,, and I am not going unless you and T come- keep smiling, maybe someone will notice us” My baby brother had an infectious smile, so I knew if anyone walked in that we” liked, and they saw him, we would have a home!

 I remember the sun literally shinning on me when a beautiful woman, well dressed walked in the gym! My brother Rob came over and gave me a look that said: “she’s the one”.

I don’t know how i knew, but i knew that was going to be my new mommy! She walked past all the kids, straight to Rob and and I, she looked down with a smile and said: “why look at you with your beautiful auburn afro- your about the prettiest little girl i have seen and I want a daughter- would you want to live with me?” I remember she smelled so good, (I would later find out Chanel #5) she had on the nicest clothes I ever saw!

BUT- I wasn’t going without T and Rob. I said to her: “I can’t go, unless you bring my sister and brothers”! 

My sister came around us; observing, listening, contemplating, using her street smart skills to decide if this woman was worth us being separated!

I was excited but scared- they warned us most people like babies, they will not take 2 kids, must less 4! We couldn’t leave baby mark! 

My sister called us over then the worker called my sister over to speak private- they always talked to her first. It was because of her street smarts we had not starved to death! 

So we did not do anything in the group home, without her approval!

 Waiting for an answer, my soon to be foster mother started telling me about her “big House” and how I would have my very own room! BUT she also said: she could only take two of us and that my sister and baby Mark could visit anytime!  I told her”no thanks” but then my sister stepped in and with a sad but convincing face said: Tanya, listen, you and Rob need a home, I will be alright, i promise I will come and see you”. While I was sad to leave my sister behind, i knew i wasn’t cut out for group home life. I was excited Rob and I now had a home and a new mommy!!

I share this story  because I am grateful to all the foster parents who share their home, their family and there time!

Raising someone else's children after neglect, abuse or abandonment is a challenge and you all here today that take the time to invest in our foster children deserve to be honored! Not just for “taking a kid”- anyone can do that- but for nurturing them back to mental and physical health, for unconditional love with hugs and providing constant words of encouragement-even when you were told they had a disability!

My life would not be the same had my foster mother not listened to her inner voice, that told her, yes, you have 3 kids but 2 more needs extra love!!

I know it was no easy task loving an angry teen but my foster mother knew I was hurt that my birth mom never came back for us. She knew because she had lost both of her parents when she was young, being raised by her grandfather! So when I rebelled and acted out as a teen for many reasons, she put on what I call “mom repellent” and challenged me to excel!!

When the doctors tried to give me a title of learning challenges and ADD, ADHD, my foster mother insisted i stay focused and channel my energy with: sports, singing in the church choir, dancing, ballet, camp, after-school activities - so that I would not become bored! Thanks to my patient, loving foster mother, I eventually got new letters - My B.A.S. from N.Y.U!!

I learned from my foster mother that a foster parent is “called” into this field for the love of helping others- even if its temporary you can have an impact! 

This is not a job you do “just for a check” because all kids will make you work for every penny!

A foster parent has a vision a goal for their child. They are able to meet the child where they are at, because their parenting instincts tell them: when their child; “IS” or IS NOT”, ABLE”, ON POINT or IN TROUBLE!”

I am here today, living proof that foster care does work if a child gets the right home- a home that teaches them, like my foster mother taught me, “I am responsible for my future and can never feel sorry for myself or lose faith in hard times!

 My mother held us to high standards and she had many requirements. 

We were blessed to have 6 tv’s in our house, but you could only watch certain shows - on one tv - together as a family and you HAD to read books and newspapers daily in order to watch a tv show in my house! 

One of my birth brothers was dyslexic but my mom did not care, she made him read and write every morning and afternoon! 

I became the best speller because when i got a word wrong, she made me rewrite it 10 times!! My mother never allowed  excuses for failure. There was no such thing as “you can’t” or “I give up” and the only title you had in her home was “my  child”!

In conclusion:

when I aged out at 21, I had good times and hard times but I always bounced back because of the values and faith my foster parents taught me!

 i am so grateful my parents insisted on the basics, I learned patience and that not everything happens or comes together, without , a vision, a written plan, hard work and thought!!

most importantly, my parents took the time to find out what each of  our God given talents and purpose were,  she told us daily: “We all have divine purpose”: My foster parents believed kids with alot of energy should be busy with ; dancing, drawing, singing, inventing things, writing stories, listening, talking, -

 your foster child has a special gift or talent that was given to them  - it is crucial you find out what “IT” is, and focus their energy on that”! 

  through  my gifts of speaking, i have been able to help children labeled with ADD- ADHD and behavior problems focus their energy and reach their potential!  -  By the way- all those other titles we label kids with; its just UNFOCUSED energy! It can be channelled to do good-  thanks to my foster parents, I am living proof! 

Thank you!

you know what it is....walking alone..have an escape plan!

hey blog family!

this is what I taught my little brother and now i am teaching you!!


I am sure you heard about the little boy who walked alone to school last week and asked the wrong person for help! I have a few tips for you!

First: it is your parents and or guardians job to MAKE SURE YOU ARE SAFE!! it is NOT your responsibility to know better, that is why you are "young, a "kid" because you should be in a peaceful, loving home that is safe and protects you from harm-even if you are in a group home!!

Don't walk anywhere alone if you are under 13...even then if you are in a big city,
take a friend or adult with you!
 Kids in group homes are easier targets (they think)... because they don't have parents watching their back....YOU HAVE YOUR OWN BACK, by having a plan!!

use you common sense and your gut feeling, if something says, i should not-DON"T!
don't talk to strangers,
walk up to cars,
trust people that want to "help" you on the street... and the most important again.. NEVER get in any ones car!!
once you do that the trail will be hard to find you!
Try to carry a cell phone when walking alone and keep it on 911 and keep your fingers on the green button to dial, this way if someone snatches you up, the call can be traced...
even if the police get on the line while your entering, you can always say "sorry, i thought i was in danger" and hang up....there is no reason to go to a car!

If you are really lost, OK, this does happen (but should not to an 8 year old because your parents are not suppose to let you walk alone to a city school!!).. go into a store and ask the owner if you could please use there phone...if you get a safe" feeling and your instinct trust them then tell them your lost but if not just ask for the phone or tell them to call the police. 
You should never be put in this situation of being "lost" BUT if you do, don't go up to any car and have a 3 feet rule (the length of your arm) if you don't allow anyone that close, they cannot put anything over your face or attack you as easy!
Never take a drink from a stranger either, they could put something in it to make you sleepy!! wait till you get home for a drink!!
Remember if you do get in a situation and someone is attacking you and you are fighting for your life: POKE THERE EYEBALLS WITH YOUR FIRST TWO KNUCKLES--HARD!!
you only get one chance to escape and you don't want to piss them off-unless they can't see!!
 this gives them a temporary blinded spot, they can't see-
THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN IN THE DIRECTION OF PEOPLE OR POLICE- never into woods or secluded area, (if you do find a spot to hide and remember where you ran from to get out later!!!
Do me a favor, if you have to walk alone go with an adult first, have them see what stores are around have them go in and ask in an emergency can you use their phone or will they help you... have an escape plan!!

BE safe and i am sorry that i have to tell you this you should be out riding your bike enjoying your summer, but now because of this! I have to share what I know - POKING OUT EYEBALLS IN A KIDNAPPING SITUATION CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE BY GIVING YOU MORE TIME TO RUN!!! I AM AGAINST VIOLENCE OF ANY KIND- UNLESS IT IS TO SAVE YOUR LIFE OR ANOTHER!! 
remember i am NOT advocating violence! i am saying if someone is trying to kidnap you or you get in a car and realize your in danger--while you are in public or a door is open---POKE OUT THE EYEBALLS AS HARD AS YOU CAN! THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO ESCAPE!!

BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW NOT TO TALK TO STRANGERS OR GET IN A CAR!!! 
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE REST OF YOUR SUMMER AND STAY ALERT TO WHAT'S AROUND YOU!! XO TANYA

words from Wallace D. Wattles -Efficient Action

Hi blog family!
 I know, summer has been fun...are you reading? writing in your journal...
. i am sharing this from another site- the orginator of the secret left a great book!
it is LIFE CHANGING if you read it and follow it!! We must learn to better ourselves, if we want success! xo Tanya

The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles Efficient Action

Chapter 13→

YOU must use your thought as directed in previous chapters, and begin to do what you can do where you are; and you must do ALL that you can do where you are.

You can advance only by being larger than your present place; and no man is larger than his present place who leaves undone any of the work pertaining to that place.

The world is advanced only by those who more than fill their present places.

If no man quite filled his present place, you can see that there must be a going backward in everything. Those who do not quite fill their present places are dead weight upon society, government, commerce, and industry; they must be carried along by others at a great expense. The progress of the world is retarded only by those who do not fill the places they are holding; they belong to a former age and a lower stage or plane of life, and their tendency is toward degeneration. No society could advance if every man was smaller than his place; social evolution is guided by the law of physical and mental evolution. In the animal world, evolution is caused by excess of life.

When an organism has more life than can be expressed in the functions of its own plane, it develops the organs of a higher plane, and a new species is originated.

There never would have been new species had there not been organisms which more than filled their places. The law is exactly the same for you; your getting rich depends upon your applying this principle to your own affairs.

Every day is either a successful day or a day of failure; and it is the successful days which get you what you want. If everyday is a failure, you can never get rich; while if every day is a success, you cannot fail to get rich.

If there is something that may be done today, and you do not do it, you have failed in so far as that thing is concerned; and the consequences may be more disastrous than you imagine.

You cannot foresee the results of even the most trivial act; you do not know the workings of all the forces that have been set moving in your behalf. Much may be depending on your doing some simple act; it may be the very thing which is to open the door of opportunity to very great possibilities. You can never know all the combinations which Supreme Intelligence is making for you in the world of things and of things and of human affairs; your neglect or failure to do some small thing may cause a long delay in getting what you want.

Do, every day, ALL that can be done that day.

There is, however, a limitation or qualification of the above that you must take into account.

You are not to overwork, nor to rush blindly into your business in the effort to do the greatest possible number of things in the shortest possible time.

You are not to try to do tomorrow's work today, nor to do a week's work in a day.

It is really not the number of things you do, but the EFFICIENCY of each separate action that counts.

Every act is, in itself, either a success or a failure.

Every act is, in itself, either effective or inefficient.

Every inefficient act is a failure, and if you spend your life in doing inefficient acts, your whole life will be a failure.

The more things you do, the worse for you, if all your acts are inefficient ones.

On the other hand, every efficient act is a success in itself, and if every act of your life is an efficient one, your whole life MUST be a success.

The cause of failure is doing too many things in an inefficient manner, and not doing enough things in an efficient manner.

You will see that it is a self-evident proposition that if you do not do any inefficient acts, and if you do a sufficient number of efficient acts, you will become rich. If, now, it is possible for you to make each act an efficient one, you see again that the getting of riches is reduced to an exact science, like mathematics.

The matter turns, then, on the questions whether you can make each separate act a success in itself. And this you can certainly do.

You can make each act a success, because ALL Power is working with you; and ALL Power cannot fail.

Power is at your service; and to make each act efficient you have only to put power into it.

Every action is either strong or weak; and when every one is strong, you are acting in the Certain Way which will make you rich.

Every act can be made strong and efficient by holding your vision while you are doing it, and putting the whole power of your FAITH and PURPOSE into it.

It is at this point that the people fail who separate mental power from personal action. They use the power of mind in one place and at one time, and they act in another place and at another time. So their acts are not successful in themselves; too many of them are inefficient. But if ALL Power goes into every act, no matter how commonplace, every act will be a success in itself; and as in the nature of things every success opens the way to other successes, your progress toward what you want, and the progress of what you want toward you, will become increasingly rapid.

Remember that successful action is cumulative in its results. Since the desire for more life is inherent in all things, when a man begins to move toward larger life more things attach themselves to him, and the influence of his desire is multiplied.

Do, every day, all that you can do that day, and do each act in an efficient manner.

In saying that you must hold your vision while you are doing each act, however trivial or commonplace, I do not mean to say that it is necessary at all times to see the vision distinctly to its smallest details. It should be the work of your leisure hours to use your imagination on the details of your vision, and to contemplate them until they are firmly fixed upon memory. If you wish speedy results, spend practically all your spare time in this practice.

By continuous contemplation you will get the picture of what you want, even to the smallest details, so firmly fixed upon your mind, and so completely transferred to the mind of Formless Substance, that in your working hours you need only to mentally refer to the picture to stimulate your faith and purpose, and cause your best effort to be put forth. Contemplate your picture in your leisure hours until your consciousness is so full of it that you can grasp it instantly. You will become so enthused with its bright promises that the mere thought of it will call forth the strongest energies of your whole being.

Let us again repeat our syllabus, and by slightly changing the closing statements bring it to the point we have now reached.

There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

A thought, in this substance, Produces the thing that is imaged by the thought.

Man can form things in his thought, and, by impressing his thought upon formless substance, can cause the thing he thinks about to be created.

In order to do this, man must pass from the competitive to the creative mind; he must form a clear mental picture of the things he wants, and do, with faith and purpose, all that can be done each day, doing each separate thing in an efficient manner.

learning how to have faith, even in hard times miracles happen!

hi blog family! look at this post from yahoo.  ( i hope you are enjoying the summer, but remember i said to read a book or two for the summer to keep your mind sharp!)

I know i hate to copy post other peoples work....

 BUT I want you all (all my blogs), (especially you teens), to read it and know that life is something we should ALWAYS value! 

even when hard times hit, 

when we lose a love one, when you have no family, 

 facing being moved to ANOTHER group home

- STILL keep your head high and know that, miracles can happen at ANY time in your life....I call this: "The last minute miracle".... 

read and understand life is like playing baseball (to a woman that is NOT in love with baseball)

....long, 

boring,

 low scores

no real contact like basketball or hockey...

 BUT just when you think your not interested......someone hits a home run! 

Then your awake and ready to watch for more action....a true fan (like a lover of life) will always be expecting something good to happen, even when your team is down and looking bad....never, ever give up hope, keep faith the size of a mustard seed!! check out this article!!

Homeless man with inheritance suffered tragedy

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– Wed Jun 22, 6:50 pm ET

SALT LAKE CITY – A homeless man whose rags-to-riches story made international headlines suffered a devastating family tragedy decades ago that may have led to his life on the streets of Salt Lake City.

A friend tells the Deseret News that Max Melitzer's wife and two friends were killed in a 1990 car crash. Melitzer was driving and, according to Karol Behling, hasn't been the same since.

Behling says Melitzer was deeply affected by the death of his wife, Janice, and his life as a transient seemed to begin after the accident. Last week, a private investigator tracked down Melitzer to deliver the life-altering news of a sizable inheritance left by a brother who died last year of cancer.

Melitzer has since left Utah to reunite with family in New York, whom he hadn't been in contact with in months.

Behling's deceased husband, Steve, knew Melitzer for more than 20 years.

"He was very much in love with his wife, I believe. And it was really hard for him — one, to have her gone and, two, to have been driving," Behling recalled Tuesday. "I'm sure that affected him a lot, and I'm sure he missed his wife a lot."

In July 1990, Melitzer was driving through Wyoming when he lost control of his car, killing his wife and two passengers, the Deseret News reports.

Behling said she recalls Melitzer lost his apartment after the crash and bounced from place to place between Ogden and Salt Lake City.

Behling last saw Melitzer in December, when he visited her husband in the hospital. She said she was surprised to hear Melitzer's family was looking for him, because he never spoke of having any family.

"I hope this works out. And I hope his family is truly interested in him because he's a good guy," Behling said.

Melitzer's family recently hired a New York law firm in an effort to locate him, and the law firm contracted with investigator David Lundberg.

Neither Lundberg nor the lawyers have disclosed the amount Melitzer will receive.

"He'd have money where he could take care of himself or hire someone to take care of him," Lundberg said. "Apparently, he does have some emotional issues. The family just wants to make sure he's set up and he's taken care of."

Others who know Melitzer say he was an example to those around him.

"He takes donations of bread and other things like that, and he tries to donate them to my ministry," said Jason Florez, who runs the homeless ministry at Mountain View Christian Assembly of God church in Sandy. "He just happens to be one of the purest hearts of all the homeless people we bring in and come and see."

Florez gave one of the critical tips Lundberg that led to finding Melitzer at Pioneer Park in downtown Salt Lake City last Saturday. He said he saw a television news report highlighting the search for Melitzer.

"I was sitting next to my wife, and I couldn't even talk. I said, `That's Max,'" Florez recalled.

Anger to acton

Hi blog family!

I remeber my first day in foster care!

being taken away from my home, 

no matter how neglected 

or starved we were,

 it was still home...

I remember getting in the car 

with the social worker and 

waving goodbye to the nice police officer, 

I remember my first drive.

Sitting in an old office, 

lots of paperwork, 

no one really talking to us, 

eccept to ask where is mommy or

 when was the last time we saw her, 

I remember like yesterday..

Hunger, gripping my stomach, 

i had not eaten since yesterday, 

I miss that pancake mix, 

it 

sure

 was

 tasty!

My sis, always there for us, 

making us feel safe while she was around. holding my brother's hand...

time to go.. wonder where? wonder when mom is coming back?

grab

 the plastic bag...

off in a car to our first "group home they say...

 I remember the ride in the car... looking out the back of the car the street narrows and everything is farther away...but  something new is closer.....

I am angry,

 i don't know why mom has not come home in weeks....

maybe longer...she is "very sick" those people say...

someone should get her a doctor!!

by: little Tanya

 i don't know why she did not come back for us..but I do know ... i do know, i am grateful to her for NOT aborting, killing or selling me!!! For not leaving me on a step! So many kids did NOT make it to foster care!! no matter what happend is was NOT your fault AND you should be grateful for your life, you can always start over every day you wake!!! You are here for a reason, to help others to save or change a life!! 

I know my mom's addictions was serious and there was NO help back in the 60's and 70's, I know it was hard for a woman to make it with no family support and a husband back from war, dismantled.....I know at that time, i was angry! But this is good!!

that anger would be the reason i fight for so many foster kids today!

 I never forget that moment, why?

 Because as long as I feel like it is yesterday, I can feel other foster kids pain and it can motivate me to take action and help!

Some of you may have left foster care, what are you doing to not only stay more than alive BUT to help others in the system? Let all of your anger, sadness and disapoinment spark the activisim in you!

 Start a blog, write a book, screenplay, create art...whatever...just do something to help others still in.

 We cannot rely on any person OR "system" that makes money on you to be your comfort"!

 We must wakeup, stop feeling sorry for our situations and make other kids feel their is hope! 

I know some of us are focusing on the abuse, neglect or abandonment issues that got us in care BUT you must remember: you are still alive, you made it! now its time to help others and minimize your pain and suffering by going to therapy, work all those issues out in the chair AND then you can help others....

life is a lesson for all of us, what did you learn? 

how can you be of service to others in the same situation? 

You did not deserve to go through what you went through but remember you must go through SOMETHING in this life to learn and share...and become something....your body is only temporary, the mind and the good deeds you do for others are forever...because they will pass it on...pay it forward....learn to turn your stories and your anger into positive actions!!!

 you are loved, 

blessed and the universe needs you!

 xo Tanya

Message delivered!

Hi blog family!

National foster care awareness month was a major success! Thank you to those who attended the event and to you reading.

I spoke to some lovely (mostly boys) and girls at a group home today.
Why this is important?
 I believe young people are going through alot today, especially young males:
Having to live up to "society's idea of success, looking at the young kid in Valhalla, who was in college, a good kid, but still was murdered by the popo...because of a DWB...driving while black!
Some say he should have just "stopped his car but remember his friend that was there said, the officer told him to "move his car", even if he kept going, the officers should have thought: this kid is PROBALY in college (it was a college party)...so they should have let him "ride off" knowing, they had a liscence plate and could have got him at home!...

I understand what you males are facing, even in the media they give you role models like"snooky from jersey shore or flav flav, or Mrs. "NY" really?
These are probably good people, BUT they are only on your screen for one reason: to make money!! 
To make money and send out the wrong message is the big thing now but I beg you not to follow! 

Please remember God made you - you are the best thing ever made- failure is not an option!!
No matter where you are in your life, God has a purpose for you EVERY day that you wake!! Know that you are King and Queen of the universe, anything you want, you can have and do!! 

Summed up: The message given today to all of our young boys....(and girls)
1.     Put goals in your mind, as big as you can imagine!
2.    Write them down what it is you want to do (be singer, lawyer etc...)
3.    How long you want to take to do it..realistically...(you can't be a lawyer in 2 months...but you can   in 6 years)...
4.   and hang up what you write as goal and time to do, so you can see everyday!
5.   find out who (counselor, therapist, teacher, friend) can help you achieve that goal!

God sends you many angels, right here on earth!! 
look around and see the stranger that was willing to help, the teacher that went out of her way....angels on earth, learn to utilize them, they want the best for you and to guide you to greatness you were born to become!!
6.    Love and value ALL life, yours, his, ours!! Never do anything that will jepordize your freedom or sanity!!


know that you are loved and have divine purpose, go out into this world and be the superstars you were destined to be!!! xoxo


Tanya

Tanya in the Journal News!

Former Bedford foster child honors her late brother by helping others

May 12, 2011  |  

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Written by

Rob Ryser

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• News
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BEDFORD HILLS — At one point when Tanya Cooper was reading to her brother from the draft of her book about surviving foster care with a smile, her brother said: 'Coop, I think you are really going to do something here. This is going to save lives or change lives.'"

A year-and-a-half since the sudden death of that dear brother Robert Cooper to heart disease at age 41, Tanya Cooper is ready to test his prediction, starting with an outreach event planned in his honor at the Mount Kisco Library.

"This is about changing the way people think," says Cooper, 46, a Bedford Hills mother of two and an advocate who credits the Bedford community for enriching her life as a foster child. "Foster kids come in scared and frightened because they never know what is going to happen next."

That is saying a lot in Cooper's case. At the time she was placed in foster care, she and her baby brother Robert were being raised in Brooklyn by their 7-year-old sister, because their mother would disappear for days on drug binges.

There were good days in foster care and days she endured rape and death threats at the hands of her foster brothers, Cooper says.

"I want people to understand how someone feels in foster care," Cooper says. "It feels like an alien abduction."

Cooper's library event, planned for Wednesday during National Foster Care Month, is about trying to reach local children in foster care with a message that they are destined for special purposes. Even more, it is about reaching families in Westchester and Putnam counties with a message that little acts of kindness mean everything to a foster child.

"Something as simple as paying a kid a compliment can go so far," Cooper syas. "Foster kids don't get any acknowledgment except when they are doing something bad."

A highlight of the library event will be the inaugural Robert Cooper Memorial Scholarship presentation to a local foster child whose hope and positive spirit are part of a dream to succeed after he or she ages out of the system.

The memorial scholarship was created in a partnership with Megan Castellano of Carmel, the executive director of the Mental Health Association in Putnam County, and a high school friend of Robert Cooper's.

"He did a lot to lift up my self-esteem and what I didn't realize until I was older was that he was doing that for me and for others while he was having a hard time himself," Castellano said.

The hope is that after the $250 scholarship money is gone, the moment will linger for foster kids that they are heard and appreciated and supported, Castellano said.

In addition to the scholarship announcement and other awards that will be presented at the library event, Cooper will read from her book, "Surviving Foster Care and Making It Work for You!"

An extension of her two foster kids' blogs and her public speaking, the book sets guidelines for enjoying foster-care life and preparing for independence.

Anecdotally, it is also the story of how education, faith and friends helped Cooper make the transition from foster care to college and a career, so that she was able to give back.

Whatever her crisis, her brother Robert was always there, telling her not to give up, even as he waged his own battle with substance abuse.

"I didn't want every anniversary of his death to come around and say 'Oh, my poor brother,' " Cooper says. "This helps me stay positive and helps me to know that his death won't be in vain."