holiday blues..how to not lose YOUR mind when life is crazy!

Holiday blues..how to not lose YOUR mind when life is crazy!

R.I.P little brother!

Hi blog family! After two years I am still missing my brother! The pain gets less but I imagine it will never sink in that he is gone so young! Forgive me for not writing, as I am facing many challenges!
Yes,
it has been a while but life and all its curve balls has been calling me!

I am older and wiser but i still have my days when one error could effect me.
There are days when life can be challenging without family and I want you to know it is NOT your imagination - life is ruff - especially without a family!

Even at my age, I still long for a family. I still hope to be adopted one day-- yes, even over 40!!

 It is a human factor to want to  be loved and to be part of a family unit....this never goes "away"- you only learn to live with  the feeling and talk yourself through it daily! lol....hey if you made it this far without family, you can learn to love you enough and surround yourself around people who love and honor you like family!

On another note
the holidays are hear.
This is the highest times for suicide and loneliness.
*Even people with family who may have had conflict, wish they could be home with love ones*

.... I want you to know that even when you feel lonely and the world is against you God will always be by your side, all you have to do is BELIEVE tomorrow will be better than today!
Faith of a muster seed!
I know some of you may have been in group homes all of your life, some may have been in dysfunctional homes but YOU are the master of your destiny by keeping faith and coming up with an alternative plan! Whatever the plan, failure is not an option, giving up is not on the list!!! God did not design you to "give up"!!!

Don't ever be so discouraged that you don't realize YOU ARE IT! 
Don't ever hurt YOURSELF or ANYONE, life is too short and we ALL have divine purpose, so don't take away another's purpose, they may be the one who saved or changed a life!
 Your the reason the stars shine at night
the reason your brother, 
sister, lover, 
friend, family,
 stranger, 
has a smile on their face. 
You are the reason someone is alive today! 
Don't ever forget your ancestors died to make sure you ENJOY this life NOW, today!!!!
I know the holidays are here and it can be sad if you have no one around, I am lucky to have my two kids. I decided to make the holidays a day to go feed the homeless and then enjoy a nice dinner. This year may be all you can do to get out of your funk--HELP OTHERS...help at a food bank for the day!! Trust me you will feel better and be inspired!


Bills may be piling up, your lover gone, the news may be violent, everyone wants to keep up with the Joneses and no one has faith anymore- but you- YOU are the ONE that will change or save a life!
Stay positive, focused and keep anger out of your life, ask God to give you peace, acceptance, and constant change and growth so that you may be of service to others. You are so wonderful have a blessed week and know God is with you at ALL times, even at your darkest hour - have faith and take action to create change! xo Tanya

save the date May 19th....Fosterkidsunite will be awarding The Robert Cooper Memorial scholarship to kids aging out of foster care! Location: Mt. Kisco/NY time:TBA  all foster kids, former foster kids, community residents and any other who love to help others are invited to join in, more to come!!

holiday gone good, what is YOUR grade?

hi blog family!
Hope you are enjoying your vacation if your in school...and still keeping your mind fresh reading a new book every month (atleast)...
and if your not in school but left foster care, I hope you are building a new "Holiday" ritual for yourself and your future family...that means whatever you hated about the holidays...(no family, no home visits, no one to visit etc...)..
YOU are now in charge to do whatever you want.
.today my kids and I went to the Brooklyn museum then a friend took us to eat Mexican dinner..
then we walked around Brooklyn..this is OUR holiday..
 it could be in church sunday and then dinner,
it could be sitting at your house with you cooking or potluck, everyone brings something to eat...
most important...you enjoy that time as "family or "friends that are like family...
whatever as long as YOU enjoy it and stop saying "I hate holidays"....most people hate them because it did not go the way they wanted in childhood---fix it, this is your life, you can fix issues like bad holidays and make it better ..if you have no family...find GOOD friends who really care about you, and celebrate with them!!! Angels are waiting everywhere to help you find your destiny!!xo Tanya

I will leave you with something my friend Tar wrote (gotta give credit)..but first.... know that you are loved and special...and the world NEEDS you to stay on your A game...without YOU this world will be different!! smile, someone is watching you!

If YOU evaluated your last week... how would YOU rate it. How did YOU advance yourself? What did YOU learn? Did YOU help anyone else other than yourself? What are YOU doing to develop into the Person YOU always wanted to be? Settling should never be an option! I give myself a C+... I can do better. If YOU can't be honest with yourself... what kind of future do you expect?- taken from my friend Tar

Rememebering Dr. KIng

hi blog family!!

we salute Dr. king for all his hard work and giving his life so that we may have true freedom!! You as young people have a calling to keep this freedom going and to honor those that died for you by going to school, traveling the world to see all 'God" has made and the universe has to offer and to respect and honor one another. There is no gang that can love you like you and no one can respect you until you respect yourself--you cannot do that if you are doing dirt--selling, skipping school, fighting, being disrespecful...You must rise and let the world see our next generation is our hero's... Rise young people, rise!! I have great respect for you and i know you can do anything better than the last genereation IF you stay focused and keep your eye on the prize of life, love and happiness!!

Remembering Dr. King

 We must remember to honor our assisnated hero's with choice- choice to do right when wrong is easier

choice to love, when hatred is everywhere

choice to be educated and world traveled, not stiffled and stagnent in one place and frame of mind!

choice to not only say we are free at last, but to be thankful for those like Dr. King thankful enough to live every day with choice, honor, respect, love and wanting to help others...

Thanks Dr. King for showing  us freedom = choice these two things is what America is about! Without choice and freedom, life is very limited. Lets keep his dream alive by doing what we were called here to do and  with each of doing this -  we can be a great nation.

by:

Tanya C

remember you are needed by this universe and God has plans for all of us, if we listen and act..xo

holiday time

Hi blog family!

yes, holiday is here again! what does it really mean? for me, it means appreciating what the universe has given me so much, that I want to help others. This life is about service, what can you do for others. I mean those who really don't have. You may think your bad off because your in a group home but there are kids in places worse than you!
You want examples? ask the kid who still has to cop for his addict mother- because CPS never came to his door!
ask the kid living in an orphanage in china, where they believe family is everything, so what do you think that child is thinking if he/she has no one...they think they are nothing..
ask the kid in Brazil or poor parts of India (or America)...who has to be sold because the parents are so broke they have no food and live in a hut structure!

it can always be worse-never forget that-- BUT it can always get better as long as you have life!!!
I need you to start focusing on how to celebrate holidays...not with "presents" but with gifts you give to others, the gift of smile, comfort..there may be a new kid in the group home younger than you that just came in and has no family, maybe you can be a good positive role model for him/her? maybe you could stop the bully from bothering them because people do respect you! Maybe you could give  him/her a coat--because you have 3 already and you can't wear all three!!
Christmas was always sad for me, even though my foster mother tried hard and gave us nice gifts, i always felt empty without my real mom. Even now without my brother on earth I always feel that lonely...BUT you can take that feeling away or ease it by making it what you want.

When my daughter was younger we would cook a big meal, wrap up as many plates a box would fit, and go feed the homeless in Brooklyn/Manhattan....then we would have dinner because now we had something to be thankful for...that for today we feed someone a healthy safe meal!!
You are not too young to start your own holiday tradition.

Think of what you love to do that can save or change a life..(it can be as simple as shoveling the driveway of a senior citizen and NOT expecting $) (it could be smiling at a kid everyone hates, but you pay good attention to them by smiling)..(it could be you draw and you make cards for the kids who are NOT going home for holiday)...simple things that YOU can do and don't need anyone's help really...
how can it help others
do you need help?

Stop believing the hype of TV holiday ..its ok to believe in santa all that but beleieve that if it is sopose to be GOD"S birthday...(strange we get gifts on his birthday?)...then he would want you to help others on this day not see how many gifts you get.... I know its a harsh lesson but think of how you can be of service to others, then the universe will bless you with all you need!

Happy holidays, stay safe and know that you are loved the most because you are highly favored and the universe needs each and everyone of you to be full!!
smile, someone is watching xo Tanya

Statitstics on foster kids

WARNING: this does NOT have to be you!!


Today there are nearly 500,000 children and youth in America's foster care system.


 As the economy has worsened, reports of abuse and neglect have increased in some areas of the country and are expected to rise. 
Of the 26,000 young people who age out of foster care each year, many end up facing life's challenges alone without the support and education they need to compete in the workplace. In this economy, they are more likely than ever to endure homelessness, poverty, compromised health, unemployment, incarceration and other adversities.


why am i showing you these statistics? Because you always need to hear the truth! You can make sure this is not you or no longer you by
Setting & Planning your goals..what do I want to do with my life, how, why, when??
2. GO to SCHOOL as long as you can! education is key to success and OPTIONS--life is all about how many options you make or have! I know people with degree's from top schools can't find work--yea but if they use their brain they can make legal money...starting their own business...etc...
3. stay away from anyone negative. avoid them at all cost--you have no time to go to jail, hospital or the morgue! You have divine purpose and need to stay focused so that you can help others like yourself one day... 
4. save any money you get, for a rainy day!! if you get $5 save 2 of that, put it away and forget about it untile you have a few thousand saved...enough to have security money to move if you needed it! There is nothing like knowing you have money when you really need it!
5. keep choosing good friends who are useful to you and you can be useful to them, like an extended family! When times are ruff, your real friends will help you out any way they can because they know you are a good person and you would do the same. value your good friends like family..
6. never give up on you! you may fall down time and time again but keep going until you get your life the way YOU want it to be; place to live, good friends, traveling, eating healthy, enjoying each day, helping others, doing what you was put here to do (help others through : painting, dance, sing, writing, counseling, teaching, whatever your purpose you have one it it is only for you! Know that the universe loves you and you are the most special person in the world! xo 
Tanya
ps. don't let the economy being down, get you down, stay on your A game, stay happy even if your "broke", because you know your ploting how to get unbroke! Don't ever sit around being sad,
 think positive and do postive and positive will come -you don't ever listen to a statistic, they always change but you know who you are and where your going come! xo